Ben Esra telefonda seni bosaltmami ister misin?
Telefon Numaram: 00237 8000 92 32
Ben Esra telefonda seni bosaltmami ister misin?
Telefon Numaram: 00237 8000 92 32
Hello, everybody! It has been a long time since I have submitted a work to the site. I am sorry for the delay. Life has thrown a lot of unexpected turns in my direction, and I have had so little time to work on my stories. Hopefully this will make up for the long wait for those of you who have been so supportive of my long ago efforts. Hopefully I do not disappoint with this story. My writing is a bit rusty, so hopefully I can start to produce again. For all of your love and support, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Love Always,
Stormy
Part 02: Beginnings
Chapter 10: Confusion of the Heart
“She touched my soul only by peeping into my eyes. I wonder what she would do, if she fell in love with me.”
–Shradha Menta
“Hoooope.” A voice cooed next to her ear.
Hope moaned, her entire body aching in protest at even the smallest movement.
“Hope, get up!” Kittie commanded.
Hope didn’t stir, she didn’t want to open her eyes whatsoever. In the calm dark of Kittie’s bedroom, she was more than content to wrap herself up in the comforter and spend the hours idling away in wonderful sleepy bliss. The feeling of downy warmth which cocooned her body was certainly doing a good job of lulling her back into sleep.
“Oh, no you don’t!” Kittie roared.
Hope felt the comforter being whipped away from her, the sudden onslaught of cold air causing her to curl up into a fetal position on the bed. She still refused to get up, but she knew Kittie would not stand for it.
“Hope! Get up, now!” Kittie yelled, throwing the shades open causing Hope to jump out of the bed and dive for cover. Kittie’s window opened up to the front lawn, anybody could have seen her in her underwear.
“Kittieeeee!” Hope complained to the sound of the young Latina’s laughter. “Somebody will see me! Shut the window!”
“Are you up, now?” Kittie asked, humor in her voice.
“Thanks to you!” Hope whined.
“Aww, poor little Hope is so abused.” Kittie taunted. “Get dressed, or we are going to miss the bus.”
Hope’s eyes shot open.
“Miss the bus? Kittie never rides the bus.” Hope thpught to herself.
Hope got up, hunching over so that nobody peering in through the window could see her. Hoots and catcalls from outside let her know she was unsuccessful as she watched some kids walking towards the bus stop. Hope closed the shades and quickly threw on her clothes. She had no idea she was this late. Hope was in a near panic by the time she ran out of Kittie’s room and into the living room. Kittie was already standing by the front door, tapping her foot impatiently.
“Hope!” Mrs. Gonzales shouted and walked out of the kitchen to give Hope a hug. “How are you this morning, a late start?”
“Yeah.” Hope replied, startled by the sudden hug.
“Mom.” Kittie intoned with impatience.
“Are you okay? Do you need to eat?”
“Mom, we don’t have time to eat.” Kittie said.
“Hold on, Hope, I will grab some cookies for you to take to school with you.” Mrs. Gonzales said, ignoring her daughter’s moan of impatience. Hope smirked as Mrs. Gonzales waddled away to the kitchen.
“God, we’re never getting out of here!” Kittie moaned.
“Language, young lady!” Mrs. Gonzales said as she waddled out of the kitchen with a Ziploc bag full of cookies.
“Thanks, Mamá.” Hope said, wide-eyed with wonder at how she was expected to eat so many cookies, and how the heck Mrs. Gonzales baked them all just that morning.
“Fine, she has her cookies. We need to go!” Kittie exclaimed.
Mrs. Gonzales waved her hand dismissively as Hope followed Kittie out the front door.
“Kittie, why are you riding the bus?” Hope asked.
Kittie did not reply, she merely smirked.
“Kittie, why are you riding the bus?” Hope asked again. “And why are you telling your mom we are late? The bus doesn’t show up for another fifteen minutes.”
“Really?” Kittie replied with a grin.
“You’re up to something.” Hope said accusingly.
“Why is it every time I do something out of the ordinary, everyone says I am up to something?” Kittie asked. Hope could see through the façade of hurt Kittie put on.
“Maybe because every time you do something out of the ordinary, you are up to something.” Hope replied. “Face it, Kittie. You are a creature of habit. Anything unusual for you doesn’t happen without a reason.”
“Am I that predictable?” Kittie asked, the surprise genuine this time.
“Very.” Hope giggled before getting serious. “What are you up to?”
“Nothing!” Kittie protested, then added under her breath,” …much.”
“‘Nothing much’ for you is never a small thing.” Hope rolled her eyes.
“Oh, ye of little faith.” Kittie responded incredulously, striking a dramatic pose.
“Yeah, yeah. Keep up the act all you want. I know you’re up to something.” Hope replied.
Kittie did not denizli escort respond, so Hope contented herself with enjoying the walk. She loved this time of morning. The slight chill of the morning air crept through her clothes, causing tingles to run up and down her skin. She loved how the morning light filtered through the canopy of leaves adorning the majestic trees that towered above her head. She listened to the song of the birds as they flitted about from branch to branch and smiled as the birds filled the still morning air with their beautiful song, as though it were a symphony of music intended just for her. Hope was in no rush to get to the bus stop despite the antics and prodding of the young Latina walking next to her. This time of the day was to be enjoyed. The only problem, as she saw it, was that it would all come to a crashing end as soon as she stepped through the doors of the bus.
Kittie chuckled beside her,” Enjoying ourselves, are we?”
“So now you want to say something?” Hope quipped.
“I have been talking to get you to move faster for the past five minutes! Besides, I am only commenting on why you are all of a sudden full of smiles and blushes.” Kittie paused before a glint of mischief formed in her eyes. “Or is it that you’re not so much enjoying the morning, but who you are going to be able to see this morning?”
“I’m not blushing!” Hope protested.
“Are too. Your face and neck are all red, and you’re breathing hard enough to wake the dead.” Kittie retorted, then paused as she grinned from ear to ear. “I really should be a poet.”
“Hope scoffed, replying,” I was thinking more along the lines of mental ward patient, but whatever floats your boat.”
“Wow. Someone is being awfully brutal this morning.” Kittie shot back. “For a minute there I could have sworn you jumped on your period.”
“Kittie!” Hope shouted, her face twisted like she had a bad taste in her mouth. “Yuck! Leave it to you to think of something like that. Then again, maybe I should so that I’d have a legitimate reason for beating you up.”
“Me?” Kittie asked, feigning innocence. “Poor, little innocent me?”
“There is nothing innocent about you.” Hope replied as they finally came to a halt at the bus stop.
“Not as many people here as there used to be.” Kittie remarked as she looked around.
“Not everybody gets the luxury of being a car rider.” Hope mocked.
Kittie stuck out her tongue and peered down the street.
“What are you looking for? A hot date?” Hope asked.
“Only if he is driving a ’67 Corvette.”
“Good luck with that.” Hope said, rolling her eyes.
“Here it comes.” Kittie remarked.
“What are you? Five?” Hope teased as she noticed the bus ambling down the road towards them. Kittie glared at her.
“Just saying, sheesh.” Hope replied, a small smile of triumph plastered on her face. It was not easy to ever get one over on Kittie, she was simply too smart. It was only when Kittie kept glancing between the bus and herself that Hope realized with a sinking feeling in her stomach what exactly it was that Kittie was up to. All thoughts of her small victory were erased with one mischievous smile from her fiery, outgoing friend. Hope groaned inwardly as she realized Kittie was not there for her, but to talk to Samantha. Hope cursed herself mentally for ever letting it slip that Sam rode the bus.
“Kittie?” Hope pleaded.
“Hmm?” Kittie hummed in response as though she had no clue what Hope was trying to ask, Hope knew better.
“Kittie, don’t.” Hope begged, feeling a sense of dread start to course throughout her body.
“I don’t know what you are talking about.” Kittie replied as the bus came to a stop in front of them. Hope stepped back from the curb, allowing everybody to go on in front of her. Maybe if the bus filled up enough, there might be a chance that the seats near Sam were taken, and Kittie’s little plot would be foiled. Finally, they were the only ones left on the curb, and she knew she never should have allowed herself even a glimmer of hope. Nobody ever willingly sat in the front seats of the bus. Yet Sam was there, in the same seat as the day before, watching every person as they walked by. Hope’s breath hitched as her eyes came into contact with impossibly blue eyes. She hesitated, standing in the middle of the aisle as she felt the same heat from the previous afternoon rise to her chest then spread across her neck and face. Her body felt like it was on fire in mere seconds. From the top of her head to the tip of her toes, her body seemed to come alive of its’ own accord.
“Move it, fatty! We need to sit down!” Kittie said from behind her, prompting Hope to step forward slightly.
“Is this seat free?” Hope asked Sam, hoping she was not blushing too much.
Sam looked up at her and smiled brightly, nodding. Sam moved her book bag off of the seat to let Hope sit down. If she were not so emotional, Hope could have sworn izmit escort Sam had actually been saving the seat for her. Hope sat down, and as luck would have it, Kittie had managed to get into a seat directly behind them. Hope put her face in the palm of her hand, knowing Kittie would waste little time.
“So, you must be Samantha?” Kittie asked Samantha, hanging over the seat with an extended hand.
Samantha looked at Hope with a very confused expression, but shook Kittie’s hand, nodding slightly. The girl looked so lost at the moment that it was beyond cute.
“My name is Kittie, Hope’s friend.” Kittie explained with a smile. “Can I ask you something?”
Samantha seemed a bit dazed still from Kittie’s sudden introduction. Hope got the feeling that Sam was not exactly the morning type of person, all of the activity seemed to have thrown Sam’s mind for a loop. Still, Samantha nodded.
“In your opinion, is Hope a good kisser?” Kittie asked, a devilish gleam in her eyes.
“Kittie!!” Hope shouted, gaining the attention of the entire bus, including the bus driver.
Hope looked over at Sam, who seemed completely shell-shocked by the question. Sam turned to face forward, her hands covering her face. Sam’s hair also shifted with the movement and concealed everything else her hands hadn’t. Hope put a hand on Sam’s arm, who looked back at her with a deep red blush across her face. Hope’s heart fluttered.
“Sam, I’m so sorry. I was confused, and-”
“That’s why you ran away?” Sam signed.
Hope dropped her head, ashamed. She had no time to react when a pair of arms wrapped themselves around her. Hope saw Sam’s head drop against her shoulder and rest there. After an awkward few seconds, Sam sat back up and smiled bashfully.
“I was so worried that I had done something wrong.” Sam explained.
“You were worried you did something wrong?” Hope asked before dropping her voice to a whisper. “I’m the one who kissed you out of nowhere, then left you standing alone in the middle of the street, and you were worried you did something wrong?” Hope asked, flabbergasted that Sam blamed herself for Hope running away.
Sam nodded with a shrug of her shoulders.
“It’s not like I get kissed very often.” Sam replied with a slightly woeful look in her eyes.
“How often have you been kissed? Not by your parents, I mean?” Hope asked.
“Oh my God, listen to us. We haven’t known each other a full day and we are talking about kisses.”
“Don’t change the subject.” Hope said teasingly.
“Yeah,” Kittie interrupted, “I still need an answer to my question.”
Hope scoffed and rolled her eyes. “So, how often?”
Sam signed back and Hope was dumbfounded. Her stare must have said it all because Sam looked intensely uncomfortable.
“I’m sorry to stare, but I am having a hard time believing that.” Hope said.
“I wish I was kidding. You gave me my first real kiss.” Sam replied looking straight into Hope’s eyes.
Hope looked briefly from Sam to Kittie, then made a decision. If she was to figure out exactly what was going on between Sam and herself, she needed to know how far things might go. She hated leaving Kittie out of the conversation, but things were about to get personal.
“So, am I a good first kiss?” Hope signed.
“Hey!” Kittie protested, knowing her plan had partially backfired. “That is so not fair!”
“Sorry, Kittie, we will talk later.” Hope replied. She knew Kittie would not like it, but she would accept the fact she was out of the loop- for now. Kittie huffed and plopped down into her seat. Hope turned back to Sam, who was blushing heavily. She found it cute how Sam bit her lip slightly when she was nervous, but cute was taking a little too long to answer.
“Well?” Hope prompted.
“I would say yes, I guess,” Sam replied,” but I really don’t know what a good kiss is like.”
“So, you enjoyed it?” Hope asked.
“For a spur of the moment thing, yes. It was- sweet.” Sam replied with a cautious smile.
“Sweet?” Hope asked.
Sam nodded.
“Is that a good thing?” Hope asked.
“I guess so.” Sam replied, looking at Hope strangely.
“I’m not going crazy. Just curious.” Hope explained.
“That’s natural, I guess.”
“You do an awful lot of guessing.” Hope smiled teasingly. However, she wasn’t expecting Sam to frown.
“It is kind of what happens when you can’t talk to everyone how you want to. You sort of live inside your head because everyone around you has already decided you were conversational dead weight. Unfortunately, that means you also miss out on some things, a lot of things. Things you would think people would talk about when it comes to stuff like that.”
“Like what?” Hope asked.
“Kissing. Relationships. All of that, and more.”
Hope was stunned into silence. She had worked at a home for the deaf, mute and blind, sure. Most of them, however, had learned long ısparta escort before to accept the nature of their condition. However, this was different. Working at the home, she had learned to watch for the slightest body changes to determine a person’s meanings or mood. They could vary widely.
Sam had probably gotten used to hiding her true feelings behind that bright, shining smile. Yet, she recognized that look in Sam’s eyes, the one that haunted Hope’s thoughts for the past twenty-four hours as the look of a person living every day in immense pain because she was forced to live an almost separate existence from the rest of the world. It was a look of longing, the desire to be a part of something. There was that something else, too. She couldn’t quite figure it out yet. Hope didn’t know why, and she didn’t bother questioning it, it just felt like the right thing to do. She pulled Sam close and wrapped her arms around the beautiful brunette. She leaned her head against Sam’s and whispered so that only they could hear.
“I am so sorry, Sam. I don’t know what you have to live through, and I am not sure that I could live like you do. I admire you for trying. I promise you, for as long as we are in each other’s lives, you will no longer have to live inside your head. You can talk to me about anything, and I will be there to listen and talk back.”
Sam melted completely against her while Hope was genuinely surprised to feel tears falling down her own cheeks. There was something about Sam that brought out a lot of emotions in her, and she knew that this could become the start of a great friendship, if not more should Kittie be right. She knew she must have hit a nerve with Sam, too, because she felt Sam’s body trembling in her arms. Hope looked down when she felt Sam moving her arms, trying to say something.
“What’s that?” Hope asked. “I missed it.”
“You have no idea how much this means to me.” Sam signed. “I’m scared, though.”
“Why are you scared, Sam?” Hope asked.
“I’m afraid that if I try to open up, I will only end up getting hurt again.”
“Why would you get hurt?”
“There’s more going on with me than not being able to speak. I can’t speak, but I can feel. I can try to explain my feelings, but how many people truly know enough sign language to talk through them with me? I can read about it. I can listen to people speak about it. However, I cannot put my own feelings and thoughts out there because nobody understands, or tries to make the time to when I try to explain. I get so confused, and I need someone to talk to.” Sam paused.
“Talk to me, Sam.” Hope prodded.
“It’s hard enough being this way for normal people who can discuss it. I’ve seen it. Hope, I liked your kiss. I liked it a lot. Not just because it was my first kiss, though that was nice too. I am a lesbian, Hope. I need you to know that so there are no secrets going forward. I don’t want it to get between us, because I feel something when I am around you. I don’t know what it is, either. It is something special, I have never felt it before. If nothing else, I want to be friends. I want to be close, because there is something about you that- god, this sounds so creepy.” Sam quit talking as she hid her face again.
“I feel the same thing, but about you.” Hope whispered, trying to ease the conversation forward. She never liked to see anyone hurting for any reason, and Sam was in obvious anguish over her feelings. Feelings for her, Hope.
Hope reverted to using sign and continued,” As long as we are being open about our feelings, I don’t know what it is, either. I felt it strongly when I kissed you yesterday. These feelings scare me too, because, up until yesterday I had lived my entire life believing I was as straight as a woman could be without being homophobic. I don’t have any idea of what it is I am actually doing, or why we are even having this conversation except that there is something about you that makes me feel- alive. I don’t know how else to describe it.”
Sam looked up from her hands and stared into Hope’s baby blue eyes. Hope looked back, feeling the intense gaze pierce her own. If anybody could really be made to feel like an open book, that is what Hope was feeling at that moment. It was like Sam’s eyes had the ability to read into her mind, ensnare her soul, and translate the deepest desires of her heart. Hope allowed it, willingly. She wanted Sam to feel her sincerity, and be able to gauge the depth of her feelings. If there was any possibility that they might explore something greater than a platonic relationship, Hope would need help. She was simply far too uncertain of anything other than the fact that for some reason, that ‘something’ had to be with Sam.
“I am not sure what to say.” Sam said after a few moments.
“Neither am I.” Hope replied, looking down at her hands. She felt the bus lurch and realized they were at school. Sam looked up and took a look around. Hope saw a look on Sam’s face that looked an awful lot like disappointment. Hope agreed with that feeling whole-heartedly. There was so much more that Hope felt was being left unsaid between them, but what? Was the magic remedy really to get down on her knees and beg Sam to go out with her? Should she profess an undying love for Sam and get it over with?
Ben Esra telefonda seni bosaltmami ister misin?
Telefon Numaram: 00237 8000 92 32